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Cross Afire #17: How Liberal is John Kerry?

Cross Afire #16: Spider-Man: Democrat or Republican?

Cross Afire #15: Eulogy for George W. Bush, 2024 AD

Cross Afire #14: Gated Communities at Home and Abroad

Cross Afire #13: Brown Men in Prison - Welcome to Abu Ghraib!

Cross Afire #12: I Don't See Dead People

Cross Afire #11: Pat, You're Fired!

Cross Afire #10: Mercenaries in Iraq - Pat Goes Commando

Cross Afire #9: Unifished Business - President Roosevelt vs. Mexico

Cross Afire #8: Voting for Kerry - A Vote for Terrorism?

Cross Afire #7: Gay Marriage - A Modest Compromise

Cross Afire #6: Pat and Jerry vs. Gay Marriage

Operation Iraqi Trashcan: More U.S. Propaganda Leaflets

Playing the Hitler Card

Cross Afire #5: Donald Rumsfeld Discovers Catch 22

Cross Afire #4: Jerry Falwell On The Koran

Cross Afire #3: Pledging Allegiance: The Geometry of God

Archive: Gulf Crisis Coloring Book (Dec 1990)

Cross Afire #2: Black Men In Prison - How Many Is Too Many?

Operation Afghan Litterbug: U.S. Propaganda Leaflets

Cross Afire #1: Donald Rumsfeld - American Hero?

Osama Video Fakery

American Crusade Trading Cards

Osama Interview

Therapy for W

Mark Twain: The War Prayer

Editorial: Newspeak, Please

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From the website of U.S. Representative Tom Cole (R-OK): "I promise you this, if George Bush loses the election, Osama bin Laden wins the election, it's that simple. [...] I never said and do not believe that a vote against President Bush is equivalent to a vote for Adolf Hitler."

CROSS AFIRE:

America's Far-Right Debate Show!

Episode #8
Voting for John Kerry: A Vote for Terrorism?

with Special Guest U.S. Rep. Tom Cole from Oklahoma!


Cross Afire #8: Is a Vote for John Kerry a Vote for Terrorism?
Script by F. Mellish and Kinbote Art by Kinbote

Missed an episode of Cross Afire? Catch 'em all!


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Transcript of Cross Afire #8:
Election 2004: Bush vs. Terrorism

Pat Buchanan: Today's guest is U.S. Representative Tom Cole of Oklahoma, who made headlines on March 3 by stating...

Tom Cole: "I promise you this: If George Bush loses this election, Osama bin Laden wins this election. It's that simple!"

Pat: Tell us more, Tom!

Cole: Well, we know the Democrats are largely supported by unions! And U.S. Secretary of Education Rod Paige has declared the nation's largest teachers union a terrorist organization!

Jerry Falwell: Are you saying the Democratic Party is pro-terrorism?

Cole: Of course not! I'm saying they ARE terrorists!

Pat: That's brilliant! But it's crazy!

Cole: Pat, who do you think John Kerry's running mate will be? You do know there's a senator pushing to allow foreign-born citizens to become President, don't you? It's obvious where this is heading!

Pat: You don't mean--

Cole: Yes! The elusive Osama bin Laden will be found in July 2004 -- at the Democratic National Convention in Boston!

Pat: As John Kerry's running mate?!

Cole: Think! Why would Osama attack the Pentagon on September 11, but not the White House?

Jerry: My God! Because he wants to LIVE THERE!

Pat: A vote for Kerry really IS a vote for terrorism! Vote Bush in 2004!

Cole: Vote to keep honor and integrity in the White House!

Jerry: And keep the terrorists out!


Copyright 2004 by the Infinite Jest Satire Collective: www.infinitejest.org